I never planned to be an advocate of co-sleeping. It always seemed a little new-agey to me, bringing to mind stories of parents whose 10 year olds still sleep in the family bed. But when Emma was about four weeks old, JMT and I were at our wits end. When we would lay Emma down in her crib or bassinet, she'd act as if it was electrified and shocking her. She'd scream and flail and freak out until we picked her back up. On numerous nights, I "slept" in an easy chair with her in my arms, nursing nearly non-stop. The only times she was at peace was in the bed with us. Because we were in a sleepless haze, it took us a while to have that lightbulb moment, but when we did, we gave up on trying to put her down in her own bed, and gave co-sleeping a whirl.
I've enjoyed the closeness with Emma, and the extra sleep it's gotten us. And I adore the tiny "minnow kisses" that Emma gives the inside of my arm when she's woken up ready to nurse and I'm still sleeping. But there are some disadvantages. Namely, you're never really all the way asleep when your tiny baby is lying in bed with you. Sure, it's better than not sleeping at all, but it's still not the quality restful sleep that I've been longing for. Also, in order to minimize the SIDS risk, we've been sleeping with the covers pushed down around our waists. And it's winter. In Colorado. My top half has been freezing for the past month and a half! And then there's the spit-up on my newly washed sheets. But who's complaining?
It's on this backdrop of mixed emotions about co-sleeping that I've been trying to put Emma to bed once she's fallen asleep in our bed. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. For the last week or so, she's taken to falling asleep in our bed, allowing me to transport her to the bassinet without totally freaking out, and then sleeping there for three to five hours--but spending the rest of the night in our bed, frantically nursing to make up for the terrible hours she spent six feet away from us.
Last night, I tried laying her down in the bassinet after her 3:00 wake up and meal, and she miraculously didn't fuss about it. The irony is that I was so certain that she'd wake up and change her mind at any minute, that from 3:30 to 4:30, I lay there anxiously awake, ready to spring up as soon as she started to yell. And then once I fell asleep, I woke up frantically around five because the covers were up around my neck and I was toasty warm, and I was horrified that Emma was in the bed and I was somehow smothering her.
One of these days, I'll learn how to sleep through the night too.
1 comment:
I came into co-sleeping with Elizabeth in much the same way. After Jim deployed (at six weeks), I quickly realized I couldn't function if I had to get up, sit up through each nursing and then put her back down. She'd generally start out in her own bed and then, upon the first waking after I went to bed, I'd bring her to me for the rest of the night. It continued in various degrees throughout infanthood. I didn't intend to do it much with Ben but now as a mom of two, I realized how much more each minute of sleep means. So its still in various forms and amounts. But if it works for you and helps you to function better, then it can be a great solution.
Do you have any fleece blankets for her? Fleece is water-phobic (I think that's the right word) when you use fabric softener (liquid or sheets). So its a great thing to put under her to avoid spit-ups, BM leaks, etc. onto your sheets because it won't wick. I usually put a receiving blanket or thin towel on top of the fleece for an absorbent layer.
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