I've been singing this Cure lyric over and over in my head and I think it sums up what we're doing--spinning, dangerously close, to that dizzy edge. The edge of falling apart. But somehow, we are keeping it together, staying on the edge and not falling in. I think that's because all of this is so right.
There's a part of all of us that second guesses major decisions--it's part of an internal gut check to make sure that we don't end up doing something terribly stupid. I second guess most every decision, from what I wear to work and eat for lunch to my daycare and nutritional decisions for my child. But, strangely, I'm not second guessing the decision to move back to Ohio. Something about it just feels right deep inside. Raising our family with our family is the right thing to do. A childhood in Colorado would be full of mountain adventure, but no secret snack-time rituals with Grandma or ornery adventures with Grandpa. The photos would be great, but the memories would all be missing something.
I won't say that I'm not sad to leave. I took a walk with Emma through downtown Manitou today and fell in love with this town all over again. I love the obnoxious tourist trap t-shirt stores, the dreadlocked hippies and their rangy dogs, the streetcorner philosophers and the midwestern yokels soaking it all in. I love the architecture and the art, the fountains and the stream. I love that my first child was born here. Perhaps she will soak in some of the local color and it will shine through her wherever we live. I love that we've had this experience in this amazing place.
But I am looking forward to going home.
